4 Habits of ALL Successful Relationships | Dr. Andrea & Jonathan Taylor-Cummings | TEDxSquareMile

4 Habits of ALL Successful Relationships | Dr. Andrea & Jonathan Taylor-Cummings | TEDxSquareMile

ALL relationships face a similar set of hurdles. We all need to be equipped to get over the hurdles, so that our relationships don’t just survive, but thrive. Based on over 20+ years’ experience of working with countless couples, Dr. Andrea & Jon Taylor-Cummings share their observations of the 4 fundamental habits that all successful relationships exhibit. Dr Andrea & Jon Taylor-Cummings are co-founders of Soulmates Academy – an organisation on a mission to reduce relationship and family breakdown across the globe, by proactively educating people to develop strong relationship capability. As a key part of this vision for social change, they help organisations equip people to build healthy relationships at home so they can perform better at work, improve wellbeing and mental health, and achieve better work-life balance. As City professionals and entrepreneurs themselves, over the last 20+ years, Andrea & Jon have leveraged their first-hand experience of the inevitable relationship challenges of high-stress careers to help countless couples strengthen communication and relationship skills, overcome challenges and improve happiness. Andrea & Jon are recognised authorities on the subject of couple relationships and marriage, with numerous public speaking engagements and several TV and Radio appearances in the UK. Their book is due out soon. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx

50 Comments

  1. Perfect video for the massive problem of national chaos we face today. My heart aches.
    What would the world look like if people implemented these habits? Please help America. Please help stop the insanity… 😓

  2. Is have a relationship with yourself ..before you have a relationship with anyone else..meet with yourself before you meet with anyone else ..have the ability to love yourself before you can love anyone else ..have tolerance with yourself even if you can’t find much with anyone else ..good relationships start with connection …and it builds from there intuition you know ..

  3. The Irony is most people here don’t have enough patient to go through 16 minutes video but want to keep a good relationship. POOAAAA

  4. This video is so insightful I have a strong survival for my marriage to last I need this thank you so much

  5. I find it very difficult to love a man who criticizes me for being somebody he wants me to be and not who I am. Change cannot come in a day. He lacks patience with my progress and Im Lacking patience with him

  6. Good advice and chemistry from both of you. I may summarize it all and say just love your partner genuinely then you will listen and look for ways to build your marriage and ways to enlarge your vision for that marriage

  7. My hubs Jack is my guide he is always with me you know always at my side and with him he gives me a great sense of intuition ..and good feelings instinct and love he is everything to me we speak a lot to one another we have a meeting of minds you know we make a great team we are good for each other …I like that he encourages independence and good learning but he is there for me you know I turn to him to keep me strong you know …I sleep in his arms at night and I awake in his arms every morning …I love him so much ..a good marriage is based upon two people who kinda just go together like me and Jack do …you know ..if we can have a great marriage and a good loving connection you know then so can anyone else…always talk to each other though never stop nattering to each other you know …I burn his ears all the time …but he don’t mind lol …so there it is have good friendships and great connections marriages do read my book in writing a great book soon about all kinds of stuff and hope everyone might read it …give it a read laugh and cry with me you know …

  8. #1. Be curious, not critical
    #2. Be careful, not crushing
    #3. Ask, don’t assume
    #4. Connect, before you correct
    YOU CAN LEARN ANYTHING IF YOU WANT TO

  9. I just love the way you guys talk, wow wow wow, I definitely practice these rules not knowing how important they are until I got myself listening to you both. This just strengthens every thing

  10. My parents didn’t argue… much. They certainly had disagreements, but they worked it out usually. My dad was focused on trying to make sure his family was taken care of, not just with the basic needs, but also their wants and desires as well. And My mom was humble enough to let him lead and have the final say on decisions.

  11. Yes.. just as the Psalm 85:11
    When Faithfulness and Love met,
    Justice and Peace shall embrace.
    (World Peace begins in a very loving home).

  12. Cultivating mindful habits like this are so crucial for a healthy and passionate relationship. Thank you for sharing this! Would love to see another few million views to ensure the message impacts more of our world. ❤❤

  13. I will be marrying by beautiful fiance in 2021 and I’m taking all this advice but it helps that I do all of this already and so does she!

  14. I like how they look at each other when one of them speaks…Its like, no matter the audience, no matter the show…I want to look at my partner because I love it so much! <3

  15. Such a great talk! "People go where they feel welcome but stay where they feel valued.", so many good points made here! ❤️

  16. @ 6:35 HABIT#1 : *Be curious* , not critical!
    **Aids with overcoming frustrations with expectations.
    ** It was Einstein who said "You cannot solve a problem with the same level of thinking that got you there."
    ** Invest the time in discovering how we’re wired differently so that we can learn how to play with our strengths rather than waste time and energy criticizing our differences.

    @ 8:55 HABIT#2 : *Be careful* , not crushing!
    **Helps us get over the hurdle of poor conflict resolution styles.
    **Take care of each other during the process.
    **Work towards genuine solutions no matter how mad we are at each other. Establish boundaries (ground rules)!
    **Come out stronger, _together_

    @ 10: 25 HABIT#3 : *Ask* , don’t assume!
    **Helps you get over the hurdle of mistrust and disrespect in a relationship.
    **Additional information is needed in order to re-frame our minds
    **Unblock challenges, by having courageous conversations
    **_Ditch_ assumptions and stereotypes
    **Encourage mutuality

    @ 12:00 HABIT#4 : *Connect* , before you correct!
    **Learn how to communicate real value and appreciation
    **Hold back on your "need" to give constructive criticism.
    **People _go_ where they are _welcomed_ but _stay_ where they are _valued_.
    **Keep the fun, anticipation and intimacy in the relationship! (Don’t risk losing the _magic_ )
    **Be deliberate about shifting the balance between connection-correction.

    -THESE ARE *KEY* PRINCIPLES. THESE SAVE RELATIONSHIPS, and lives.
    -We are pack animals. We need connection.
    -Be intentional
    -Invest in what you value! Be honest and forthright.
    -Habits require repetition. Be mindful.

    CURIOSITY. CARE. QUESTIONS. CONNECTION.

  17. I wish me and my husband had this year ago… Maybe l wouldn’t be where l am today. 2 suicide attempts still in love with him… And on my knees most everyday asking God to take away the pain or take me away. He wants to be friends but it’s impossible to find forgiveness in my heart gave my best years of my life and now he starts a new life with a younger asain girl. I’m done with love.

  18. Nice talk. but let’s face it, You only ended up teaching some of the strategies "habits" to deploy in trying to fix symptoms and not deal with the root cause of relationship issues.

  19. This is one of the star videos on youtube! This should be like one of the most important videos.

  20. So valuable all these talks. I feel all relationships without communication it’s hard to build a firm healthy foundation if communication is of none existence. I like these it makes me want to be better and better. Co parenting good also as they play one from the other if both parents dont work together in parenting and compromise in doing so supporting one another in it showing united front for there sake. Empathy is so needed I feel. and I feel statements good too I learnt with my course then saying you. I’m learning more too so thank u .

  21. I was having real life problems when my friend recommended Alvin to me. I contacted him because my business partner was shaking me, stealing money from the business and also my spouse was always up at odd hours clearly that is a sign that my spouse is cheating, so the hacker remotely hacked into their devices and granted me total access to their devices without their knowledge. I was overwhelmed that i could see their hidden finances that were off records, read their old and new texts messages, i could see their files, Facebook, Instagram, messenger, WhatsApp, Snapchat, emails passwords, tap their phone calls without their knowledge… Now it’s not just suspicion I have facts and evidences against them .. IT FELT LIKE HAVING THEIR PHONE IN MY HAND … His email is alvinlandry007 @ gmail com and WhatsApp +1 (707) 267-7873. I recommend him to everyone reading this post. He is the best man for the job. Thank me later

  22. Im married to my husband Jack and I’m happy out connection is a living one ..he means everything to me …we have been married many years …like an old fashioned married couple …we never argue or disagree and we agree on everything we have fallen for each other .. We fell in love during a game of monopoly on holiday in Devon …I bought some hotels you know …now we are happily married …and I wouldn’t have it any other way …he,a my hubs and I love him so much …

  23. I suspected my wife of cheating on me but I never had any proof. This went on for months, I didn’t know what to do. i was so paranoid and decided to find a solution, i saw a recommendation about a  hacker and decided to contact him. I explained the situation about my wife to him and he said he was going to help me.I gave him all the informations he required and afterwards i received all my wife’s iPhones Text messages, whatsApp messages and calls, I was hurt when i saw a picture of my wife and her lover. I feel so bad about infidelity. but i am glad Mr James was able to help me get all this information, if you need help you can contact him via Gmail (worldcyberhackers) or whatsApp : +12678773020

  24. Yeah they’re the chosen ones… they’re called Twin Flames 🔥 🔥 because it’s a divine union, they are brought together by the universe to inspire the people in this planet. Twin flames love each other unconditionally because they’ve incarnated together so many times. It’s natural for them to be gentle and kind with each other.

  25. I’ve so many words to pour about my failing marriage. Nothing will work now. Wish I and my husband watched it long before

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