How to Get Over The End of a Relationship | Antonio Pascual-Leone | TEDxUniversityofWindsor

How to Get Over The End of a Relationship | Antonio Pascual-Leone | TEDxUniversityofWindsor

Have you had an important relationship end and felt a bit stuck on how to move on? Clinical psychologist Dr. Antonio Pascual-Leone calls this “emotional baggage” or “unfinished business” and speaks about a 3-step process that could help you wrap things up and “finish the feeling”. Antonio is a clinical psychologist and associate professor at the University of Windsor, where he trains psychotherapists and is director of the Emotion Change Lab.

He has received several career awards from international societies (2009, 2014), distinguished publication awards from associations in US and Germany (2010; 2016), and is an honorary research professor at the University of Lausanne (Switzerland).

In addition to 14 years of university teaching, he has given over 35 clinical workshops around the world and received several more awards for his teaching and mentorship (2016; 2018), recognizing his leadership in education and his innovation teaching psychotherapy skills. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx

50 Comments

  1. Days off are the worst right now. Broke up after 8 years, and when I’m keeping busy my mind doesn’t get stuck. She was the first and last person I seen every day that I could talk to. Never noticed how small my support system is until now

  2. so freaking painful it is 🙁
    she always said she loved me , i’ve never been in love before, all were just normal relationships
    im back on bezo’s and tramadol just to numb myself . any advice ?

  3. To be honest I was so confused and I was stuck in my problem but after I saw so many recommendations about *Dr danja the spell caster* I contacted him and he saved me. His a life saver

  4. a big thanks to *Dr danja the spell caster* who brought back my ex after living for three months

  5. 👆👆I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate.

  6. Day 10 of 2.5 years gone , everyday I wake up I cry for a good 30min , you know what makes it worse, he didn’t tell me he’s married . It hurts so bad , it’s likes 💀 death. I wish I can take a break from the pain somehow

  7. my relationship was restored back with the help of *Dr Danja The spell caster* he’s a great spiritualist massage him now

  8. Step 1: where does it hurt?
    Physically: my chest, my throat, my eyes.
    Emotionally: the happy memories we shared, the loss of a best friend, the loss of the possibilities of what we could have had, the loss of safety, pure love, adventure. The loss of his warmth and the way he says my name, my nickname. The one nobody will call me again. The way he opens his jacket to let me hug his warmth. The way he squeezes me to annoy me. The way we laughed and loved..

    The worst part of it: the fact that the only reason we broke up was because I couldnt stay here and he couldnt move anywhere else. That i had something so amazing but i gave it up . That hes my everything, my rock, my mountain. The worst part of it is that I treated him anything less than what he deserved and that I wont be able to be with him or hug him or laugh with him like we did before.

  9. Higet help from dr,asika in any kind of problem you might be encountering,he can help in getting someone (Ex) back, money spell.job spell, marriage protection spell,love spell, curt cases spell, make himself/her confess spell , cleaning spell,also breaking evils curses and cure any type of sickness or disease on your body. He really help me that why I am referring him to you.advice you seek his help now Thanks

  10. Damn, the comments are ridiculously relatable.
    2 years of relationships only to be told I’m Being cheated on for months.

  11. 👆👆I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate.

  12. 👆👆He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay.

  13. ✝2348135968802⏯⏯⏯♻️♻️🚻🎦现在给他留言寻求帮

  14. Am here today just because someone decided to end a 8 year marriage with two kids claiming they found clarity. Good for them. I hope the future holds the best thing for my heart.

  15. yesterday he broke up with me in my car right before school. saying how he has too much commitment for the summer. “it’s me, not you” he was smiling and laughing all day with his friends while i was bawling my eyes out the whole day. today he left school early cause he couldn’t handle it. he apologized to me saying how he wanted to spend the right of his life with me and that he wasn’t going to move on. “the image of you with other people kills me” he keeps telling me how much he loves me 💔

  16. It hurts when I see 4.2 million views. That’s a lot of breakups and lot grieving like me.

  17. She was the one that texted me first, laughed at my jokes, made me feel happy and useful. She gave me a birthday gift that I have not ever expected, brightened my days, made me fall in love. Then we dated the first and only night, then all things which may be just my fantasy turned wrong. She started to ghost me, I texted her several times, hoped to bring those feelings and beautiful memories back, but nothing happened like I imagined. Last night I texted her, told her that I missed her and all she replied was thank you. I could tell from her attitude right after the night we made out that something had changed. However, I could not imagine that it went bad so quickly, just like a tictac of time. Before that day, everything was so beautiful, we had so many happy conversations. The day after, she never talked to me like before. I knew, always, in my mind, that I failed that night. But I cannot help feeling so badly of myself. I don’t know what the reasons are, cannot figure it out. What I can do now is sitting at my working table, drinking a cup of coffee, keeping thinking about that night, about the kiss, about the feeling my arms holding her.
    You made me fall in love, then you ghosted me, Why, T? Why?

  18. It is a challenging and painful decision. It takes time to heal. Mainly when the ex blames everything on you and takes the ending with so much hate toward you. Oh well, it is time to move on…no guilt whatsoever. I know it was the right decision.

  19. Break ups of today are sooooooo hard…./social media .. seeing what the other person is doing is crushing in EVERY WAY!!!!

  20. GOD WILL CONTINUE TO BLESS *DR DANJA THE SPELL THE* FOR ALL HIS GOOD WORKS CONTACT FOR ANY KIND OF PROBLEMS

  21. I just lost a nearly 5 year long relationship. We spent every waking moment together. Things got really depressing for the last couple of months, I was really depressed because of my job and she just wanted to get away. But I truly thought we would pull through the tough spot like we always did. We had big plans. She cheated on me at a work event out of nowhere, and that was that. It’s been a week, and I still feel like I don’t even want to be alive. I don’t know where to start with building a brand new life. I know it’s for the best, the feelings were genuine for both of us but we were both just using the other to fill a void due to past issues. Somehow that makes it hurt even more, you really want to believe it was worth something.

  22. 👆👆I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate.

  23. What hurts the most for me is looking back at when things were so beautiful together. What happened? Why can’t we get back there. Everything was so perfect for so long and then it just crashed. It’s a tragic relationship that was doomed from the start. It was all passion and emotion and not enough love. I closed the door to the relationship because he was hurting me and he couldn’t see it. When I’d tell him, he’d laugh at me, make it a joke, and tell me I’m sensitive. It’s still painful though. He is the first person I’ve ever been in love with. Day one starts now.

  24. a big thanks to *Dr danja the spell caster* who brought back my ex after living for three months

  25. A few days ago i was broken up with after 5 and a half years. I truly believed that he was the one i would spend the rest of my life with. The pain is unbearable and i feel so numb and empty and just lost. I’ve been crying non stop and it’s hard to eat or sleep or do anything. I feel so alone

  26. GOD WILL CONTINUE TO BLESS *DR DANJA THE SPELL THE* FOR ALL HIS GOOD WORKS CONTACT FOR ANY KIND OF PROBLEMS

  27. my relationship was restored back with the help of *Dr Danja The spell caster* he’s a great spiritualist massage him now

  28. That was an awesome talk . It brought me some comfort and clarity about a lot of things. Critical thinking critically needed, great job for those in need of healing.

  29. To be honest I was so confused and I was stuck in my problem but after I saw so many recommendations about *Dr danja the spell caster* I contacted him and he saved me. His a life saver

  30. 👆👆He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay.

  31. 👆👆He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay.

  32. It’s really helpful. I’ve been going through a breakup which reminded me of my decade old true love. Things become difficult after betrayal whenever you started feeling love and next moment that person is not there,sudden change of emotions, whole reality. I’m glad I heard him.

  33. Higet help from dr,asika in any kind of problem you might be encountering,he can help in getting someone (Ex) back, money spell.job spell, marriage protection spell,love spell, curt cases spell, make himself/her confess spell , cleaning spell,also breaking evils curses and cure any type of sickness or disease on your body. He really help me that why I am referring him to you.advice you seek his help now Thanks

  34. This is it. We both know it, there’s no going back. We were miserable and in a few months I’m moving across the world.. After 8 years of dating.. I’m only 22, he’s 25. He’s moving out today, in the evening. We both cried even thinking about it. The worst is yet to come.

  35. I think what hurts the most is she isn’t as sad as I am and that hurts because it means she didn’t care as much.

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