Marriage counselors, What are the Most Common Mistakes couples make? r/AskReddit Reddit Stories

Marriage counselors, What are the Most Common Mistakes couples make? r/AskReddit Reddit Stories

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  1. This is why we shouldn’t even get into a relationship if we can’t agree on the 4 Foundational F’s!

    1. *Faith*
    (Theist with an atheist? LDS with a Catholic? Reformed Baptist with a WOF Charismatic? Being unequally yoked is a big hard stop to step back and assess if God really brought us together or are we acting in our own lusts. This is the first foundation to determine if we’d stay teammates or become opponents.)

    2. *Family*
    (Do you want children or not? More importantly: do you want to BE parent, not just want kids because of selfishness or that “it’s the next thing to do…?”)

    3. *Finance*
    (Are you disciplined, while they carelessly live above their means? More importantly: are you a workaholic and are they a sluggard who thinks the world owes them for doing nothing? Are you a planner and they a reactor? Do they look forward to leaving a legacy or do they burn through what they have?)

    4. *Fitness*
    (Do you treat your body like a temple or a trash can? Are you dogmatic about your eating habits or are you flexible? Do you drink and smoke excessively or will we hike/bike/gym together?)

    And not to mention that if you have an ex: they’re an ex for a reason. Be content being single than settling for no reason or worse: bad company corrupts good morals and will only bring heartache and pain.

  2. 1. Complaining to friends and family and online about your partner. Don’t. Do. It. You WILL ruin your relationship and the relationship after that and the relationship after that and the relationship after that. Because what happens is even though you just need to vent and you love your partner, your friends and family start holding it against them and start hating them and treating them badly because they hear you complain all the time. Also it upsets your partner that you’re constantly making them out to be a bad person. Get a therapist or a private diary if you want to vent about your partner. It’s incredibly disrespectful to talk badly about your partner. Period. Keep your relationship issues PRIVATE between ONLY whoever is IN the relationship. Take this advice or leave it but don’t pretend you don’t know why every relationship you have keeps falling apart. It’s because you keep getting your mother involved in the relationship issues and then you post about it online. You and your partner are a TEAM. It’s supposed to be you guys against the world.

  3. My ex wanted me to never talk to any lads other than him, and whoever he saw me talking to one he’d say I was cheating on him and not talk to me for days on end. But it’s “different” when it’s him to talk to girls. Like, idc if you talk to other girls, I ain’t so insecure that I get messed up over that shit. Well anyway he cheated on me after 2 years together lol, gotta say I was relieved tbh. I felt so trapped and he made me feel like I was always the reason why things went wrong In my life, when it rlly wasn’t. Now I’m single and can actually live my teen years without constantly feeling like I can’t do what I actually want to do

  4. ok, the gratitude thing, its for all relationships. my mom barely said thank you or things like that, just said i should do something better. but my sister gives me gratitude all the time and i jsut soak it up like a sponge.

  5. A girl rejected me because I did things she didn’t like but never told me she just took it and then one day blew up, it took me a long time to realize that she was the one with the problem because she couldn’t talk to me about what was bothering her

  6. It might be people who marry only because their community calls it "Right in the eyes of the Lord" or something. Hellfire and brimstone sermons can make some people psychological wrecks. Some people "Save it for marriage" but their sex doesn’t actually work because they are still having flashbacks to all that "Sex bad purity good" stuff.

    Lakeside Christian School of Clearwater Florida, you suck. Congratulations on tricking people into awful marriages.

    5:43 also, unfinished student loans, especially on dumb majors to overpriced schools.
    11:19 love is like a fart. If you have to push it, it’s probably shit.
    17:29 Good thing they don’t have kids yet. Divorce is bad for kids, but what some don’t realize is parents fighting nonstop is even worse.
    20:55 If you are going to get married, have your lawyers make a really good prenup as insurance. Just remember not all prenups work.
    23:44 Well, that’s another problem the "Go forth and multiply crowd" won’t talk about. They will just blame media that portrays the 20s as a wild free for all and married life as a boring end to it.

  7. 1# Be emotionally mature and aware of your own feelings and the feelings of others. 2# Communicate, communicate, communicate, COMMUNICATE! These 2 rules go for all interpersonal relationships.

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